Relying on God in impossible situations...
Well, I'm sorry I got sidetracked. I wanted to catch you up to speed. Now I need to rewind a bit.
J's kindergarten year went well, he enjoyed his teacher and his friends. 1st grade, however, we were not so lucky. That's when the bullying started. (J) Would come home depressed and short-fused. He would go to school crying saying he didn't want to go. I was hurting for him. We prayed for the bullies, we talked to the teacher and the principal. Every time we would hear "If it happens again let us know." Well, it did happen again over and over, I got sick of it. I needed to protect my child. My husband and I finally agreed to take (J) out of school. We would enroll him in CAVA (California Virtual Academy).
CAVA is a public school online, completely free. (J) And I were totally excited to start our new adventure together. My middle child (N) was now enrolled in Kindergarten with CAVA as well, so I had a 1st grader and Kindergartener home to do school. CAVA is an excellent school don't get me wrong, but its' curriculum is super thick and very hard. After each subject, there was a test to make sure the children have mastered the lesson. You had to be getting at least 3% work done each week, or you would be kicked out. There were 7 subjects a day each child had to get done. Every Monday we would have a mandatory online class meeting with the teachers and all the students. You really weren't supposed to miss them, on top of that we had compulsory tutoring every day except Friday, and I was supposed to be present at each "tutoring meeting." The beginning of the year went exceptionally well, we were able to school without a hitch.
Out of nowhere, my children started hating the program, they would fight me every day to start school. One child would act out and so would the other. Trying to keep my youngest entertained and quiet while the other two were on the computer doing their work was very hard. I was spending most of my time with the older two, my younger child was being entertained by movies and TV. There was never any real leeway if your child was sick or having a bad day you still had to press on and get the work done, or you would be playing catch up.
CAVA started in mid-August. My hubby and I decided to go on a family camping trip back home with the family. CAVA said there was no way we could do that. Eventually, they agreed that we could go as long as we were schooling (on vacation) and checked in with the teacher once a week so that she could mark the lessons they had finished. Needless to say, I was really stressed out because it never felt like a vacation, my children hated the idea because the children in that state didn't start school until September.
I was beginning to regret my decision to take (J) out of school, battling with my husband almost daily with this decision. I also had a hard time submitting to my husband and his final decision that this was the right thing to do.
All the while getting support from family, friends and CG group was the only thing that kept me going. I was in a cycle of not relying on God to get me through this. My sister had sent me this verse and quote to help me. It was about finding Joy in your daily life. " Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of Joy! He who goes weeping, bearing the seed for sowing, shall come home with shouts of Joy; bringing his sheaves with him." Psalm 126: 5-6
You say you can't sow the field this spring because I am brokenhearted and discouraged? If you do that will you eat in the winter? Suppose you say instead I am heartsick and discouraged. I cry if the milk spills at breakfast. I cry if the phone and doorbell ring. That is the way life is. I do not feel like it, but I will take my bag of seeds and go out in the Fields and do my crying while I go do my duty. I sow in tears.
If I do this the promise of this psalms is that you will ' reap with shouts of joy.' you will come home with shouts of Joy, bringing your sheaves with you. Not because the tears of sowing produce joy of reaping but because the sheer sowing produces reaping. So in doing your duty whether it's in tears, you will one day reap the Joy.
I prayed each day to find the Joy in CAVA. I prayed that God would give me the strength and wisdom to get me through it. God provided an open door on the camping trip, my other sister was homeschooling with a curriculum called My Fathers World. She boasted about how great it was, how her children loved doing the schoolwork every morning.
I still wasn't on board with homeschooling when we got back. I was a little jealous that my sister had a better time with homeschooling than I did. Then another wise sister of mine explained to me that submitting to my husband in this decision to homeschool is submitting to God.
I had to earnestly pray for God to speak to me, for him to show me this truth she was speaking and live it. I sat down with my hubby and had a heart to heart. I explained to him how I respect his decision, only by God's good grace, but that I wasn't happy continuing with CAVA. I asked him if we could find the curriculum My Fathers World cheaper than the website offers and asked if we could switch. I did have to explain to him the point of homeschooling. And, that we had to find a curriculum that our children could enjoy learning from and that I would enjoy teaching.
God provided! We found (N's) Curriculum and on eBay for $100.00 less than the original price. (J's) Curriculum we decided to go with the basic set on their website, with the help of my mother we were able to take our children out CAVA and purchase My Fathers World. Only now I had1-second grader and two kindergartners, My youngest now 4 is doing kindergarten.
This curriculum is such a blessing to our family. There has been less fighting, more bible time and my children beg me to start school in the morning.
My advice to you is to Pray. Pray you too can find the Joy in life. I found mine.
Well, I'm sorry I got sidetracked. I wanted to catch you up to speed. Now I need to rewind a bit.
J's kindergarten year went well, he enjoyed his teacher and his friends. 1st grade, however, we were not so lucky. That's when the bullying started. (J) Would come home depressed and short-fused. He would go to school crying saying he didn't want to go. I was hurting for him. We prayed for the bullies, we talked to the teacher and the principal. Every time we would hear "If it happens again let us know." Well, it did happen again over and over, I got sick of it. I needed to protect my child. My husband and I finally agreed to take (J) out of school. We would enroll him in CAVA (California Virtual Academy).
CAVA is a public school online, completely free. (J) And I were totally excited to start our new adventure together. My middle child (N) was now enrolled in Kindergarten with CAVA as well, so I had a 1st grader and Kindergartener home to do school. CAVA is an excellent school don't get me wrong, but its' curriculum is super thick and very hard. After each subject, there was a test to make sure the children have mastered the lesson. You had to be getting at least 3% work done each week, or you would be kicked out. There were 7 subjects a day each child had to get done. Every Monday we would have a mandatory online class meeting with the teachers and all the students. You really weren't supposed to miss them, on top of that we had compulsory tutoring every day except Friday, and I was supposed to be present at each "tutoring meeting." The beginning of the year went exceptionally well, we were able to school without a hitch.
Out of nowhere, my children started hating the program, they would fight me every day to start school. One child would act out and so would the other. Trying to keep my youngest entertained and quiet while the other two were on the computer doing their work was very hard. I was spending most of my time with the older two, my younger child was being entertained by movies and TV. There was never any real leeway if your child was sick or having a bad day you still had to press on and get the work done, or you would be playing catch up.
CAVA started in mid-August. My hubby and I decided to go on a family camping trip back home with the family. CAVA said there was no way we could do that. Eventually, they agreed that we could go as long as we were schooling (on vacation) and checked in with the teacher once a week so that she could mark the lessons they had finished. Needless to say, I was really stressed out because it never felt like a vacation, my children hated the idea because the children in that state didn't start school until September.
I was beginning to regret my decision to take (J) out of school, battling with my husband almost daily with this decision. I also had a hard time submitting to my husband and his final decision that this was the right thing to do.
All the while getting support from family, friends and CG group was the only thing that kept me going. I was in a cycle of not relying on God to get me through this. My sister had sent me this verse and quote to help me. It was about finding Joy in your daily life. " Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of Joy! He who goes weeping, bearing the seed for sowing, shall come home with shouts of Joy; bringing his sheaves with him." Psalm 126: 5-6
You say you can't sow the field this spring because I am brokenhearted and discouraged? If you do that will you eat in the winter? Suppose you say instead I am heartsick and discouraged. I cry if the milk spills at breakfast. I cry if the phone and doorbell ring. That is the way life is. I do not feel like it, but I will take my bag of seeds and go out in the Fields and do my crying while I go do my duty. I sow in tears.
If I do this the promise of this psalms is that you will ' reap with shouts of joy.' you will come home with shouts of Joy, bringing your sheaves with you. Not because the tears of sowing produce joy of reaping but because the sheer sowing produces reaping. So in doing your duty whether it's in tears, you will one day reap the Joy.
I prayed each day to find the Joy in CAVA. I prayed that God would give me the strength and wisdom to get me through it. God provided an open door on the camping trip, my other sister was homeschooling with a curriculum called My Fathers World. She boasted about how great it was, how her children loved doing the schoolwork every morning.
I still wasn't on board with homeschooling when we got back. I was a little jealous that my sister had a better time with homeschooling than I did. Then another wise sister of mine explained to me that submitting to my husband in this decision to homeschool is submitting to God.
I had to earnestly pray for God to speak to me, for him to show me this truth she was speaking and live it. I sat down with my hubby and had a heart to heart. I explained to him how I respect his decision, only by God's good grace, but that I wasn't happy continuing with CAVA. I asked him if we could find the curriculum My Fathers World cheaper than the website offers and asked if we could switch. I did have to explain to him the point of homeschooling. And, that we had to find a curriculum that our children could enjoy learning from and that I would enjoy teaching.
God provided! We found (N's) Curriculum and on eBay for $100.00 less than the original price. (J's) Curriculum we decided to go with the basic set on their website, with the help of my mother we were able to take our children out CAVA and purchase My Fathers World. Only now I had1-second grader and two kindergartners, My youngest now 4 is doing kindergarten.
This curriculum is such a blessing to our family. There has been less fighting, more bible time and my children beg me to start school in the morning.
My advice to you is to Pray. Pray you too can find the Joy in life. I found mine.
Beautiful. So proud of you for walking this out and sowing in tears! And rejoicing with you with SHOUTS! ;)
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